No, I personally don’t want to stick it in YOUR caboose, but I present to you our new Ticklesack Jam:
“I Want to Stick it In Your Caboose”
(In the key of Elton John’s “I Guess That’s Why They Call it the Blues”)
Well I thought I might stray
Cause I’ve been tapping it the same way forever
(ooo ooo ooo ooo)
Between her butt cheeks
I’ve been praying all day
That this would make our love better
It don’t make gaaay
Bust out my demons inside
Wanna conquer that hole
Or we might done
Between your two buns
My weiner will hide
So I want to put it in your caboose
Tapping that ass from the back sets me loose
I don’t want children
I don’t wear rubbers
My penis lingers
Your booty hovers
I’m about to stick it in your caboose
(RICH AD LIB)
So I want to put it in your caboose
Tapping that ass from the back sets me loose
I don’t want children
I don’t wear rubbers
My penis lingers
Your booty hovers
I’m about to stick it in your caboose
(Spot Harmonica Solo)
I Don’t Want Children
I Don’t Wear Rubbers
And I finally stuck it in her caboose
As you know, each March we grow out our facial hair, and on the final day of the month, we shave it into a mustache to pay tribute to one of the best facial adornments ever. And this year, we added a bonus – those of you that decided to participate have the chance to win a RealTouch (best mustache wins a RealTouch…something to stick your ween in… REALTOUCH) Details on how to win below the pics.
And now, I present to you the staches of the C&R Show:
Covino Stache….
Rich Stache…
Spot Stache…
To win the RealTouch, you can submit your photos in a dedicated thread on the C&R Forum or e-mail your pics to spot@maximradio.com
Hey what’s going on guys, this is ya boi Jayson and this is your official recap of today’s show.
The show started off by the guys talking about their morning and what happened to them yesterday. Rich was saying how this morning he was at the coffee shop, and he saw John Stossel from FOX news. Nicole from his other show was saying how he was acting like a little bitch when he saw him. Covino said how he saw Tom Green yesterday and he had a nice mustache. Covino was also reiterating on the subject of his ticket from yesterday and what he did about it. Then Rich brought up the subject of American Idol last night and how they were POA because they sang the Jitterbug song by Wham. Rich said they all were gay.
After the break, Comedian Richard Lewis was in studio. He came in to talk about his tour that he’s currently doing. The Misery Loves Company tour. Covino and Rich was saying and talking about his time on Curb you Enthusiasm. Rich was saying that his body language from interviewing him is that he seems very annoyed. He says he’s not he’s just tired hasn’t gotten any sleep. Covino was saying how there is a difference between comedians back then and now. Richard was saying how he doesn’t give a fuck, he doesn’t really care about it, and it is what it is. He was saying the less people get into his buizness or worry about him, the happier he is, but do support him in the comedy world.
Next, on the chopping block were the guys talking about the NFL and drugs. They were saying how they are drug testing players who are drafted or are going to be drafted. They rich completely changed the subject and was talking about how when you’re taking a family portrait and your brother or sister is dating a person and they completely ruin the family picture when you look back at it in years and you’re like who’s this ass hole. Callers call in and give their opinion.
Back from the break Covino was talking about best bullet songs. Callers call in and give their advice on which are the best bullet songs. Then they guys brought back up the subject of NFL players and how the NFL is coming out with rules of drug testing the players. Rich was saying how almost more than half of the players will come back dirty. Callers call in, and then a special NEWS ALERT Travis Barker is teaching Rihanna how to play drums. Covino was saying how he’s teaching her how to play the drums because he’s going to be drumming on that ass!
Next, Actor Rob Corddry comes into the studio. He was talking about his upcoming film Hot Tub Time Machine. The guys were talking about since he was from Boston is he a Redsox or Giants or Jets fan. He said he was a Jets/ Giants fan because he lives in New York for him. They guys were also talking about his history on the Daily Show with John Stewart and also how his movie is going to be a success. They asked him what decade does he think when girls were the hottest. He said the 20’s. He also said the 70’s just because of girl’s hairy bush. He also said that when he was younger he was an eagle scout and he has never had so much pussy in the world until he was a eagle scout.
Next, was a couple of news alert, apparently Leanne Rhymes smashed Tiger woods, I guess shes hole number 17, Jesse James and Melissa Smith have been fucking for the past 2 years, according to her, also Jesse was also offered 500,000 to pose for playgirl. People were complaining to facebook saying that they caused people to get syphilis because of online internet dating and meeting. Lastly, about the Chinese boy who was born with 15 fingers and 16 toes.
Next and the last topic they talked about on the show were the things that your parents did when you were younger that you hated that you actually do now. Callers call in and talk about it.
This is your official update of the Covino and Rich show! Make sure you stay tuned to see what happens!
Hey guys! What’s going on? This is ya boy Jayson the one and only intern, and this is your official update of the Covino and Rich show.
The show started off good, they guys didn’t want to but they brushed on the subject of the health care bill that passed yesterday. They didn’t necessarily talk about the bill, but they talked about what the vice president said which the f bomb was what he said. Then the guys got into an argument with each other because Covino was saying that he feels that nobody cares that he is going to be on the show. Rich was saying how people are going to care because the show is funny, and people watch Abc comedy Wednesdays.
Next, Rich brought up the subject of American Idol. He was saying how it was stupid for them to have Miley Cyrus on their coaching the contestants when she is only 17 years old. Rich was saying she’s not a good performer, she’s just a performer. Then he asks the listening audience is it harder to take orders from someone in the work place that’s younger than you? Callers call in and respond.
Next, the first in studio guest came in. Eric Stonestreet from Modern Family came into the studio. Rich was saying how he loves his show. Eric was insisting that he’s not gay, but he also was saying it’s not fair that his on camera lover gets to feel on Sophia’s breast and gets hugs and stuff. Covino asked Eric if it is easier or harder for him to get girls since people assume that he’s gay in real life, he was saying yea it is cause all girls want to do is hug him, and not give him play. He was also saying that before he became actor he was an improv comedian in Chicago. Check him out on Modern Family on ABC comedy Wednesday.
Next, after Eric left the studio the guys were talking about baby daddy drama. They were talking about how Beyonce’s father Matthew Knowles is a paternity test proven father again. They were saying how he has to pay an 8200 a month in child support.
Next, Rich was talking about how he got in argument with some of his co workers from his morning show the morning mash up. He was saying how they were arguing about two things. The first thing was how if you smoke in your car, how nobody wants to ride with you, and the second thing they were arguing about was if you’re an artist and you die how you become a legend. Callers call in and give their two takes on these subjects.
Back from the break Covino was talking about how Jesse James is being considered to be in association with white supremacy. They were saying this because his Maltese cross from his company and an Nazi iron cross are basically the same. Then they guys talked about the Reggie Bush/Kim Kardashian break up.
Next, in the studio Stone Cold Steve Austin was in the building. They were talking about his new movies that are slated to come out later this year. Damages which is currently out on DVD and Expendables. Covino then brought up the subject that he was driving in LA and got a ticket, and is trying to fight it. Callers were calling in and giving advice, and then Steve Austin also gave his take on it. Steve Austin then was talking about how he wants and is trying to be a better actor. The next guys then asked him what he thinks about TNA Wrestling. He says its okay, he respects it and watches it, and so then they asked him what it would take for him to get back in the ring. He says it would have to be WWE and a shit load of money!
Next, after the break the guys reiterated the issue of the traffic ticket, and Rich and Spot give him some advice. Covino then talks about how in his inbox sometimes he sees his friends or associates that he hasn’t talk to in years, and how they try to beat around the bush asking him how he is and all kind of other stuff, but in the mean while they want him to get an autograph or tickets to a concert or something from him. Covino was saying how he hates that. Covino asks the listening audience is that okay for people to do that or a total headache. Most callers call in and say it’s a bitch and a headache.
This was your official update of the C&R show. Stay tuned for more to see what’s happening!
That’s right, we’re doing it live all week long, poolside at the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in Las Vegas!! We’re doing it right, celebrating with Bud for the Bud Light World’s Largest Pool Party. Be sure to check us out LIVE at a special time all week – 6p ET (during our usual replay slot). Here’s how the schedule looks for the week:
3/17/10
12p-3p ET: C&R’s Best of Spring Breaks Past
6p-9p ET : C&R LIVE from Vegas
3/18/10
12p-3p ET: Replay of 3/17/10’s show from Vegas
6p-9p ET : C&R LIVE from Vegas
3/19/10
12p-3p ET: Replay of 3/18/10’s show from Vegas
6p-9p ET : C&R LIVE from Vegas
3/22/10
12p-3p ET: Replay of 3/19/10’s show from Vegas
6p-9p ET : C&R’s Best of Spring Breaks Past
Check back here every day, as we’ll be posting more pictures and videos from the debauchery in Vegas.
Hey guys! This is Jayson one of the interns, and this is your official update to the Covino and Rich Show!
The show started off well, the guys were basically recapping that tomorrow they will be in Vegas to do a live show for the rest of the week. Then Rich was talking about how he was trying to do something different when he goes to the gym by taking his headphones to the gym, to make time go by faster. He said while working out he was flipping on tv between TNT wrestling and WWE. Rich was saying how he couldn’t get into it. Rich was asking is that wrong that he couldn’t. Covino was telling him no, that wrestling has changed from back when they were growing up to now, the only thing that is better is the women wrestlers says Covino. The guys then asked a question, what are things that you liked by when you were 13 that you still love now. Callers call in .
Back from the break the guys were talking about how they are going to be in Vegas for the rest of the week. Back on the subject things you liked when you were younger and still do, Covino changed it up and talked about how he doesn’t enjoy collecting baseball cards as much as he did back then. Then Rich started to talk about what they were going to do for the whole week in Vegas besides gambling. Then the guys went back on the subject of things they still love now that they are older. Callers call in.
Next, Rich was talking about how he was watching the bachelors last night, and the show was about how much bootay the guys were getting on the show. Then the show went on and C&R was talking about power ballads from rock bands back then. A lot of callers call in and gave songs
Next, Rich brought up the subject of what to do in Vegas, talking about gambling. Talking about they don’t want to spend their money and lose their money if they don’t win. Callers call in and give them advice on what to do in Vegas. Next, it was a new alert! Rich was saying how now there is more traffic on facebook, than google. They were saying that this is POA that more people care about facebook, then searching on google. The guys then played a commercial from huggiegram. They were asking what is a huggiegram. The guys were explaining what it was, and what it is used for, and they make jokes about it. Then, they were talking about a battle between the Mutal bank of Ohama and Oprah over a saying. They are fighting over a saying of a ah ha moment. C&R was saying how the two are having an argument over who came up with the phrase. Covino brought up Barnondo’s ah ha moment when he was an intern here. Then the guys went on the subject of the school teacher calling his students losers so he can relate to them. One parent got upset saying that it’s wrong for a teacher to say that, and saying that he’s bulling the kids. Then the guys also talked about hockey, and how one guy playing got checked into the wall by another player. Callers call in and give the review of it.
Next, before the show wrapped the guys talked about Spot, and his girlfriend’s ultimatum. His girl basically told him by next summer she wants to be engaged, and if not then they need to break up. Spot tries to give his reasons why he’s not ready now, but how he loves her. Callers call in and give spot advice.
Well, this has been your official update of the show, be sure to tune in the rest of the week while the guys are in Vegas to see what they are up to!
Hey C&R listeners, this is Alex the “intern” giving you an update of today’s show.
The show started off with C&R talking about a new internet video that superimposes people’s faces and makes them look like a hero to the entire world. Rich thinks that if you show an old person this video, they wouldn’t be able to know it was a fake because they are so technologically primitive. Covino thinks that is ridiculous and any old person who has the slightest clue about technology would immediately know it wasn’t real. An older caller named Yvonne thinks that Rich is crazy because she uses Adobe Photoshop all the time, but Rich says its unrealistic that most 66 year olds are like that. Rich finally agrees that old people are not nearly as dumb as young people think they are.
Rich says there is a big difference between milk and cream but Covino disagrees. Rich gets fired up by this because he says Covino always disagrees with him just to be a douche. He finally calms down and Spot brings down two cups of coffee (one with milk and the other with cream). Rich tells the difference between the two very easily and Covino concedes that there must be a substantial difference or that Rich has superhuman taste buds.
C&R talk about when men try too hard to be manly and end up just hurting themselves. Covino says there’s no point in trying to prove your dick is bigger than everyone else’s. Rich says that he doesn’t take many shots when he goes out because it makes him feel like shit and doesn’t care if people think its unmanly of him. There is some disagreement over some manly actions like eating bloody burgers because in that case its actually worth doing. The conversation reminds me a lot of Dave Chappelle’s “When keeping it real goes wrong”.
A caller says that Covino is giving people advice not to be manly because he himself drinks daqueris in front of his dudebros at bars. Rich comes to Covino’s defense, however, by pointing out that Covino gets more pussy than anyone he’s ever met so it doesn’t really matter what he drinks at bars. Covino asks whether you are trying to get into the pants of your friends or the pants of girls.
News Alerts: Jet packs are now available for purchase at 75,000 dollars. A woman got hit by a subway train in uptown NYC, Conan O’Brien is taking his show on the road.
Jenna Morasca from survivor comes into the studio. Rich starts telling a story about how he saw a sign for a 50 dollar massage for 50 minutes and thought this was an incredible deal. When he goes to the parlor with Sara, however, he sees that creepy man is supposed to give her a massage. Since he didn’t want the guy touching Sara, he switched masseuses and got a really weird and creepy massage from this dude. Jenna says that she doesn’t like getting massages from guys because she always thinks they are going to “stick a digit in”. (Note to Reader: Jenna Morasca is incredibly attractive, funny, and cool in real life).
Jenna says strippers never actually like their customers but pretend to because its a profession and they are trying to get more money. Rich disagrees and says that 1 out of every 10 strippers actually likes their clients. Jenna says that even when they have sex with their clients its only to get more money. A caller claims that a stripper once got off on his leg, but everyone in the studio is highly skeptical.
Jenna says she likes skinny black men with dreadlocks. She admits to having a huge crush on Lil Wayne.
C&R and Jenna talk about the chef from NYC who made cheese out of his wife’s breast milk. Jenna says she would only eat it if the wife were hot. She said that she had to eat much grosser stuff when she was on survivor so its not that bad. I pull up a picture of the chef’s wife, and Jenna retracts her statement because the wife is definitely not attractive.
After Jenna leaves the studio, C&R talk about how Spot has a secret life that they don’t know about. They discover this when they look through his Facebook pictures and see that he’s doing stuff and hanging out with people they’ve never seen or heard of. There are strange pictures of Spot in his profile of him biting random people’s asses and Covino doesn’t understand why Spot doesn’t take it off out of respect for his girlfriend. Covino says that when he is with someone he takes down pictures of his exes.
This has been the recap for today’s show, but keep tuning in for more C&R!
Hey what’s going on dudebros? This is Jayson one of the interns for the Covino and Rich show, and this is your official update of the show for today.
The show started off with the guy’s reinterring on the subject of March-Stashness. The guys were saying that you can shave your neck, but you have to leave your beard and mustache until the end of the month then you have to shave it all off except your mustache. Then, after they had a little trivia game about the intro music to the show, they asked callers to call in and give the name of the six songs that play in the intro. After the little trivia game the guys went back to the March-Stashness and was talking about how a guy was saying that chicks really dig guys with grey beards. Covino and Rich was agreeing but they didn’t agree on the gray thing. Then Mercer, from the dudebro forum called in to remind callers about the dudebro convention.
Next, Covino was talking about how theirs an explosive rumor going around about Micheal Jordan. This topic tied into the next topic that Rich brought up about the Howard Stern show how he had the mistresses of Tiger Woods affairs, come in for a pageant. One of the girls was comparing Tigers sex game to Micheal Jordan’s and Bruce Willis. Rich was saying how these girls were selling out these guys out. How these girls will do anything to keep their names in the headlines.
Next the guys were talking about jobs. How when they were interns at radio stations they use to pretend that they were DJ’s to get chicks. In turn, Covino and Rich ask callers to call in and tell the ways they use advantage of their job to get girls. A lot of callers call in and give opinions on this. Then the guys finally move on and Rich asks a question to Covino. He was asking him about music, then he started talking about American Idol, and he asks does the original song sound better than what they American idol performers are singing on the show?
Next, the guys were talking about their parents, and then they started asking questions about what their parents do on their computers. Covino’s friend Barnondo’s father has a porn addiction. He was saying how his father goes down to the basement and ruins his father computer by looking at porn. So then the guys ask do old guys jerk off to 20 year old girls? Callers call in and give their expertise.
Next the guys were talking about families. They were talking about family history and where they came from. They were telling all the dudebros that they need to find out from their grandparents came from and what they did. Then the guys started talking about what you should and shouldn’t have on your resume. They were saying how you shouldn’t have references and shouldn’t have template designs either.
Next, we had a studio guest Jeff the Jerkman. He was in studio talking about his famous jerky. The guys in turn try to come up with a way to give away free jerky to a listener, so they try to get him to come up with a question for the listeners and he can’t. This goes on for like 10 minutes, until they finally come up with a question. Then the guys were talking about the six women in New Jersey, and how they were getting butt implants. They were using household caulking products, and the girls had to be hospitalized because their butts were all lumpy and bumpy.
The last topic the guys were talking about was Jessica Simpson. She was on Letterman last night and the guys were talking about what she said about John Meyer and how hes a sexual dynamit and how she doesn’t look the same as she did in Dukes of Hazard.
This is your official update! Stay tuned for Covino and Rich!
As you may or may not remember, Jesse Ventura (former WWF wrestler, former Minnesota Governor, and current conspiracy theorist) appeared on the Opie & Anthony Show on Sirius XM a few months back. He got into a heated debate with comedian Jim Norton, resulting in Ventura walking off the show and almost ending in a fight. Here’s the youtube clip from O&A:
While he stopped by the Covino & Rich Show today, we had the opportunity to ask him about this incident. Here’s what he had to say:
Obviously, Jesse has moved passed this, but be sure to tune in to Opie & Anthony tomorrow to see if there’s any backlash.
Opie & Anthony can be heard on The Virus on Sirius XM – XM202 and on the Best of XM Package
Hey guys! This is Jayson and this is your official recap of the Covino and Rich show!
The show started off with the guys saying hello to each other, considering that Covino is back in LA, and Rich is in New York. The guys talked about the special guest they were having on the show today. Then they started talking about kids, most importantly lying to your kids. They were saying and asking what will the dudebros on our show tell their kids, and what are they going to lie about, and is it a good idea to lie to them? Next, Rich brought up the subject of J.Lo and how she was on the television show How I Met you Mother last night. Saying that for the character she played she was pretty good. Covino was saying there’s always somebody making a special guest appearance on the show, does this mean the show is being canceled or going off air?
Next the pro wrestler turned politician Jesse Ventura arrived in studio. He was talking about how he just got in from Mexico a couple of days ago. He was also saying how he was living without television and radio for the past six months. He said the only show that he’s seen in the past couple of months was the superbowl, but he had to drive to a friend’s house to watch it. Covino told Jesse that his toy of him sucked, that he use to play with when he was a child. Then Rich started talking about his history in politics, and his past wrestling world. He asks does he still stay in contact with the wrestling world. He says no, that he’s very disconnected from the wrestlers, and the wrestling world. Then Jesse starts taking things in his own hand and talks about Demolition. Demolition referring to conspiracy, he says his book American Conspiracy explains everything. Covino and Rich started talking about that he had with another radio station host. Then Jesse brings it back and starts talking about theories of conspiracy. Things like 2012, and the 9/11 theory. Jesse says the biggest cover up in history in his opinion is the assassination of JFK. Jesse then leaves the show.
After Jesse left and there was a short break, Covino was talking about how his beard looks black and awful. Then the guys started talking about Lindsay Lohan and how she is suing e-trade because she feels that she is the Lindsay that they are talking about in the commercial. Callers start calling in saying how can she sue when there’s millions of Lindsay’s in the world. But judge for yourself…
Next, the guys were talking about songs that probably were made for the summer, but get played during the spring. Rich was saying the new black booty clapping anthem for the summer is Ludacris How Low. Then Rich was saying how during the break as he went to the restroom, some of the coworkers at the radio station was saying that Jesses sorta crazy. This makes Rich ask the question if you’re thinking outside of the box, and believe this theory thing, does this make you a little crazy also? Callers call in and give their opinion. Then Rich starts to also talk about this restaurant in NYC that feeds you so much food for only 40 dollars. Callers also call in and give their opinion.
Next, Anjelah Johnston stops by to bless us with our presence. Rich immediately asks her because she’s so pretty does that sometimes come as a set back? She tells her in a way it can be, but she makes the best of it. Then, Anjelah started talking about her history as a cheerleader, then to a standup comedian. She says that she’s a little hood. She tells the listeners that she has an upcoming movie with Carlos Mencia. Then the guys ask her does she get a lot of play from dudes in the club or at shows? She says no, but then they started talking about the difference between black guys trying to holla, and white guys. She was saying how black guy’s voice gets deeper, and white guy’s voices get higher. Then Rich asks her the first time that she did stand up did she immediately find her groove or didn’t she. She said immediately she found her groove. Then Covino asked why are they blocked from George Lopez twitter? She says she doesn’t know, he’s a cool dude, but she doesn’t know why. Then she tells us to make sure we check out her movie that comes out this Friday, and leaves.
Next, the guys went into the subject of Pussification of America. Covino was talking about how he was at the mall with his girl, and this dude tried to get him to come inside the Abercrombie store with no shirt on. He was saying that this is wrong, and that the store is way off if their trying to get dudes to come inside the store (warning, content below is uber gay!!)…
Next, was the guys talking about a naked snow woman and how it was on some ones lawn, so the owners called the police and the police told them to get a bikini and put it over the snow woman…
Next, were the guys talking about SLIM T’s. This is a shirt that gets your body looking younger and slimmer hiding you gut for men. Covino was saying this is POA because it’s stupid men should be comfortable with their bodies. Callers call in and give their opinions on this issue.
